Tag Archives: family

A LETTER TO MY MOM

Dear Mom,

This is the first Mother’s Day without you here.  I keep thinking to myself that I wish I could be taking you to a special brunch this morning, but instead we’ll be celebrating your life and legacy.

I thank God every day that I had the opportunity to be with you during your final days.  Throughout your pain, you continued to be a spirit of hope.  You taught me what it was to fight with dignity.  But most importantly, you shared with me some lessons that have changed my life over the last year.

Life has a funny way of teaching us like that—it was during some of your weakest moments that you taught me life’s greatest lessons.  And for that, I am forever thankful!

Thank you for teaching me that love multiplies.

As a mother, you think you can’t possibly love anyone or anything more than your children.  Then, grandchildren come along and prove you all wrong.

Being a grandma is truly one of life’s greatest gifts and the relationship with a grandchild is one that cannot be put into words. As a grandmother, or as my ten grandkids call me, Mimi, you’re able to love fully with less worry. The pressure of creating the rules or keeping a roof over their head is no longer a distraction. You’re able to live in the moment and cherish your time together.  Thank you for reminding me to make the most of each opportunity I get to be with them.

Thank you for teaching me to be courageous.

You shared with me your regret over not confronting some of the more difficult conversations with your children over the years.  You told me that you wish you would have said and done more.  Please know, that I was listening to each and every word and they’ve helped me to be brave enough to do this with my own children.

As our families continue to grow, we tackle new challenges and changes, and that often means talking with one another through those often-difficult experiences. Although it can be uncomfortable, you reminded me that we have to sometimes continue to be a parent and not a “friend” to our children. We sometimes have to show them how much we truly love them by taking a harder stance.  And most importantly, we have to give our children time to go find themselves and to seek the answers on their own.

 Thank you for teaching me the importance of hard work.

You had the most incredible work ethic.  Mom, you taught me the power of ambition, strength and dedication.  You lead by example and I carried those hard-work lessons with me when I started my own business.

My only wish is that you would have rewarded yourself more and taken more time for you‑you deserved it. I share this lesson with my friends who constantly make everyone else a priority. “It’s okay to treat yourself and put yourself first—you earned it.” And today, on Mother’s Day, I think this message is more important than ever.  Every woman out there (mothers, grandmothers, step-mothers, aunts, and any women who gives of herself to mentor others) should do something wonderful for herself today, and I hope someone is doing something thoughtful for you, too.

I wish I had said more of this when you were here. I would love for one more conversation with you so I could tell you all this in person. But I hope you’re celebrating today in Heaven with Grandma Jewel, as you told me she was with you during your final days.

Love you always,

Patty

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Love Has No Labels

There’s an old saying – you can choose your friends, but not your family (luckily for me, I’ve gotten pretty lucky in the family department!). I bring this up because when it comes to falling in love, it’s a lot like family – you don’t “pick” who you fall in love with – it has so much more to do with that powerful feeling that comes over you and a connection to another spirit that is often independent of gender, race or creed.

I’ve attended many LGBTQ events over the years, and it has opened my mind even further to the challenges many of these individuals face in our society. Once I listened to a gay couple talk about why gay marriage was especially important to them and about the adversity they faced when they wanted to adopt a child. In their particular case, the only children many adoption agencies would allow them to adopt were babies who were born from drug-addicted mothers. They brought one of these frail babies home with the commitment and intention to love this baby through everything. We parents know how hard it is to raise even a healthy newborn baby – sleepless nights and endless worry are always part of the package. Yet, here, they said that if something happened to one of the fathers and he was the legally-bound adopted father, the other would have absolutely no rights to the child.

Along those same lines, say a lesbian couple experiences a terrible accident and one is admitted into the hospital – the woman who has loved and dedicated her life to her partner is not allowed to enter the hospital because she’s not considered family. How can this be?

I believe when you have been so committed to someone, have loved him or her, and worked together through life’s day-to-day challenges – you have the right to be married – regardless of your gender. Love is love.

As PRIDE month comes to a close and Cincinnati PRIDE parade approaches this Saturday, I want to join other organizations like Procter & Gamble and Macy’s who have come forward to support this cause. Like the amazing video above, love truly has no labels.

The Men of Pure Romance

imageI was so pleased to see the response we received from the Father’s Day Men of Romance blog series last week. It was probably one of the most fun blogs I’ve had the opportunity to do. We often hear the cliché that “behind every great (and successful) man, there’s a great woman.” I think in this case we see that the reverse is often true! In this business, I work directly with the Pure Romance Consultants and don’t often get to meet the husbands and fathers who support them. There’s often the assumption that it’s one person’s obligation to keep things going, but these couples are showing us that there’s teamwork on both sides to keep a marriage and family on track. Even better, they aren’t just talking about how to do it, they are showing their children and all of us by example.

The way that the responses were written, it’s easy for people to think that their lives are fairytales, but they know that everyone has bumps in the road in life and it’s all about how you deal with them. These couples have a plan in place and have one another’s backs – it was a true inspiration!

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Father’s Day Blog Series: Men of Pure Romance

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I think it’s so important to show appreciation for the people who show us love and support in our life. In the hustle and bustle of operating a business and taking care of our family we often lose sight of declaring that appreciation, which is why I think it’s so wonderful we designate a day to do just that.

First and foremost, I want to pay tribute to my Father today. He passed away at a young age from a heart attack. My Dad was a real “man’s man” who drove a truck for Keebler for 20+ years. He did the best he could with what he knew, which I believe is a statement that remains true for all of us in the realm of parenting. My Dad was rough around the edges, probably drank a few too many beers on occasion, loved Elvis Presley and had a difficult time expressing affection. However, I never questioned my father’s love for me. I saw his love in the everyday little things, like when my first car broke down, he took me to the dealership and said, “You can pick any car in the lot, but you’ll be responsible for the monthly payment!” To an outsider looking in it wouldn’t seem like an expression of love, but to me, the love was in the lesson: I can have anything I want in life, I just have to work hard to pay for it. My Dad also made time to call me every week despite his busy travel schedule, and after I had the boys he carved out time to spend with them every other Friday. He would pick Nick and Chris up, make giant milkshakes and curl up in front of the television to watch The Dukes of Hazard. Despite losing my Dad unexpectedly, I cherish the opportunity I had to see him show affection through his love for Chris and Nick. The boys were so young when Dad passed, but I see a lot of my father in the men they are today

Dad collageThis Father’s Day is exceptionally special because I now have the opportunity to watch all three of my sons and my son-in-law in their role as a Father. I’m sure many of you have heard me talk about how different all of my kids are, and it is definitely shines through in their parenting. Regardless of their discipline techniques or paternal instincts, they all have their own way of loving their children and supporting their significant others and it is those qualities that will benefit their children in the long run. I believe fathers are the ones who set the standard for what their sons will be like as a man, and for their daughters, they create healthy patterns so they can find the right type of love in their life. As children, our parents give us our first experience of love – we often look for those qualities in our future mate. It makes me incredibly happy to see all four of my boys with their children – they are always 100% present, and when they aren’t with them I can see the love they have shine through their eyes when they talk about them or show me a picture. It is a surreal moment when you see the little boys you used to diaper and discipline turn into fathers. It’s a beautiful gift and today I want to wish all of them a Happy Father’s Day.

To all of the wonderful men of Pure Romance, you are true rock stars! Thank you for supporting your leading lady in her business and setting a perfect example of love and support for your children. Happy Father’s Day!

Father’s Day Blog Series: Men of Pure Romance

Robert Johnson IV and Tiffaney Johnson have been together for nine years and married for five. Their family includes: Celeste (15), Nevaeh (14), Max – their “doggie” (9) and Sid – their Bearded Dragon (5). 
Tiff & Rob Thank You
FOR HIM…

Describe three responsibilities you take on to help out with the kids and/or your wife’s Pure Romance business.

1. One of the biggest responsibilities I take on to help is acting as the family IT person. Keeping Tiffaney and the girls updated, safe and connected is an extremely important task. Not to mention keeping a lookout for what might be coming in the future that could really help her.

2. Everybody needs a Handyman, and I happen to be that for Tiff. Be it putting together office furniture (which I’m convinced replicates like bunnies), or building custom cases to carry her demo items to parties, there never seems to be a shortage of things to build with her.

3. Marketing, Marketing, Marketing. Another way I help is by doing what I can to get her name out. Wearing hats and shirts with her information on it never stops for me. To work, to golf tournaments, to the mall – I seem to always run into someone that has been looking for a Consultant and handing out a business card or her mobile app is easy.

What are your secrets to a successful marriage? 

I got some really great advice a while back that I think really moves the bar in our marriage. That being “If you support her, keep her smiling, protect her, and always put her first – she will love you for a day past forever.” This is something I’ve put to the test with Tiffaney, and thus far it’s been more than true. Past that, the biggest secret would be to listen just to listen, not listening to solve a problem. Sometimes that’s all she really wants.

What do you like most about being a dad?

The thing I like most about being a dad is honestly how much they make me laugh and smile. My girls are forever teaching me new things as the world changes in their lives. From new sayings to new dances and styles, they keep me in touch with not only their youth, but also my own at times. The thing I really enjoy doing with my girls is exposing them to new and exciting things, or sitting together playing anything from Little Big Planet to Farkle and Monopoly.

What is something you admire about your wife – please explain/describe?

There are a number of things I really admire about my wife, but one thing really stands out: She’s been doing this for close to a decade, and I’ve seen her come home after $25 parties, and $2,000 parties. I’ve watched her mentally work past tough feelings when she went from Red to Pink, and saw her focus on every positive when faced with the easier decision to just give up. The thing I admire the very most is her strength. I’ve been saying for a while that I would move our family to an area that was more receptive to her business so her business could really explode, and her response has never wavered – “I’m going to put Dallas Fort Worth on the map, I’m going to make it work right here. Somehow.” To me she’s amazing to watch and her strength shows in every choice I see her make.

Rob photo grid

FOR HER…

Marriage in this modern-day-society can be a difficult thing to manage, especially when you are a hard-working businesswoman. What are some secrets that you practice in your marriage to build into your relationship? Obviously he’s a keeper!

I always call and/or text him to let him know that I have made it safely to my parties and when I am on my way home from a party.

In this day and age of the “Independent Woman” your husband always needs to feel needed. So I always try to remind my husband that he is needed, by giving him the opportunity to fix things around the house, build something for me, open jars, reach things out of high cabinets, open doors, and plan date nights. While many ladies may make a lot of the money to always pay the handy man or the yard guy, you have to remember to give your partner the chance to do it and show your appreciation.  Something as little as appreciating when he unloads the dishwasher or does the laundry doesn’t go unnoticed.

I also pull out some of the products we sale. In our industry, we have to remember while we are helping other ladies’ relationships that we have to remember to nurture our own with our own products. Pull out the Hot Heart & Aura, give him the men’s line to wear, grab a blindfold and flogger, or play the Date Night Game. That’s why they become so supportive – in the back of their minds, they know things are going to be a lot of fun in this business. I have a wonderful wish list of items of things I want, so he always knows what to buy.  Tell him the fancy items you want him to buy for you, even if you can go out and get it for yourself. If you are constantly doing for yourself, you never give your partner an opportunity to do it for you.

I get dolled up sometimes just because; it gives him something to fantasize about all day. We often get all dressed up for a party or day job, but then come home and change into the sweat pants and T-shirts. Every now and again, put on your best outfit just to go see a movie with your partner or for dinner. Pull out some nice heels, dress or skirt. We assume the five minutes they see us before we leave or come home that’s enough but it’s not, so it’s okay to be their eye candy.

We have fun. Have fun in your relationship. It can’t be all business all the time and what everyone else has to say about your relationship. My husband and I have a private Facebook group. Yes, it’s just the two of us on it. We drop selfies on it through out the day or a thought that made us think of the other person. No drama, no issues, nothing serious. But it’s a great way to brighten up someones day, since we’re already caught up in our cell phones, tablets, and social media. Make it useful for more than everyone else. Think of each other from time to time in the simplest form.

Do you have anything special planned to celebrate Father’s Day?

This Father’s Day, he will get to do what he loves the most…play golf and spend time with me. He loves golf, and I have grown to enjoy it over the years as long as he is the one playing. It’s a pleasure to see his excitement when I ride along in the golf cart. He is at peace on the golf cart – no worries just fun. With all of the rain that happened last month, he was unable to play at all. So a day on the golf course, followed by a steak dinner (one of his favorites) will be perfect. Plus he doesn’t know this yet, but it’s time to update the family photos, so I will be scheduling a family photo shoot as well for this summer before the girls go back to school.

Tiff

You have screamed your husband’s name and made it obvious that he has been a wonderful supporter of you, your family and your business. Can you give me a story about how he has supported you?

You know, I could probably write a book on all of the different ways he has shown his support over the last eight years of my business, and he probably doesn’t even realize it. It’s difficult to sum it all into one story, but I will try.

When I first started, he would drive me to out-of-town parties and sit for 3-4 hours in the car, at a nearby Starbucks or in the parking lot, and wait for the last lady to leave so he could come re-load the car for the long drive back home. He built me custom gun cases to carry my demo novelties. He doesn’t fuss that my home office takes up an entire bedroom of our three-bedroom home. He shows up to every corporate event and family friendly team meeting where he is welcomed, and talks to other spouses and helps out when he can. He proudly wears Pure Romance logo gear around town and tells the world his wife runs her own business. I have watched him label products and catalogs for me through late hours, and he manages to keep all of my technology safe and secure as my CIO (as he has been titled). But I think the one memory that has really held my heart in this business was the one evening I called him after a $100 party. I was upset and distraught and ready to throw in the towel; I ranted and fussed on the car ride home and he said nothing. When I was finished he said, “Babygirl, look at it this way, you now have a $100 you didn’t have three hours ago, you had fun, and if you do it 15 more times you will have a $1500-month.” All I could do was laugh because he was was absolutely right.  At that moment, I realized he was never going to let me give up that easily, and he was going to continue to support and motivate me.

My thoughts: Wow! I LOVE the story Tiffaney shared about her husband changing her outlook on a $100 party. In this business, many can get down on themselves after the inevitable lows. As someone outside the Pure Romance business, he was able to show her a different perspective – telling her that 15 $100 parties would be a $1,500 month gave her a new positive point of view; this is a trait that is invaluable in a husband and father.

I also smiled reading about Robert sporting the Pure Romance gear wherever he goes. He’s her walking billboard. If Tiffaney had to pay him for all of the promotion he does for her business, it would equal a full-time marketing department! The way he touts her business shows her and everyone he comes in contact with how proud he is of her. Not to mention, he’s also her CIO (Company Information Officer) and builds office equipment – he could deduct himself in taxes! This is not a guy who sits on a hammock or La-Z-Boy recliner, remote and beer in hand. There’s nothing more applaudable than a man who asks his significant other what she needs and does it with a smile and as “his pleasure.”

One thing is for sure; their two daughters will see the way Robert honors Tiffaney, and learn first-hand how a woman deserves to be treated. It’s a great life lesson for their family. Sometimes we forget to take into consideration all the things our significant others do for us. Father’s Day is truly a day to thank the special men in our lives.