Sexless Marriages: All Too Common

Sexless marriage post

Sadly, I hear stories about sexless marriages regularly and wanted to share a few thoughts with you on the topic.

Sexless marriage is more common than you think. Studies have shown more than 5 percent of married couples have gone at least a year without sex. One in five married people surveyed have remained celibate a month or more.

The first thing I always tell these women: You are not alone.

And wanting to spark that flame is the first step toward reviving their love life.

Our sexual health experts say couples who are open with each other are less likely to remain celibate. We know that our libido shifts throughout life because of biology and also outside stresses, so it’s important to work together to identify barriers to physical and emotional intimacy.

Share your desires and be willing to try new things offered by your partner. Remember that “normal” for you, in your marriage, can be whatever the two of you agree on.

Intimacy won’t be recovered overnight, so make a plan — together! — that gives you time to rebuild that relationship. Schedule dates. Make time to talk and touch one another. Be sensual with each other. No toy alone will fix a sexless marriage, but bedroom aides, whether a simple massage oil or a couple’s game or a new sex toy, are tools for pleasure and relationship-building.

Sex is just one kind of intimacy, but it’s a vital part of a long-term relationship. It’s a unique connection that makes a person feel desired and wanted, and everyone deserves that.

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4 Comments

  1. Sophia Marie Herrick

    According to my husband, for men sex is a very often their only or main means of expressing their love for their spouse or significant other because they simply lack the ability to express it in other means. In other words, they just don’t know how to do it through verbal communication and other physical activities!

    I’m lucky in that my husband has found his emotional self (thanks to therapy after a failed first marriage after nearly 20 years together). He’s lucky because I’m more open to exploring new things to express my love in the bedroom than I ever did with my first husband ().

    Neither we nor they are perfect so give men a break when they have problems in and out of the bedroom expressing their feelings.

  2. Rose Hilsenbeck

    What if male wants and the female is not really interested

    1. pattybrisben

      The same rules apply! Communication is the most important tool!

  3. Florida

    When you are used to a certain sex life and it changes dramatically something is usually wrong. It was in my case. Now he only wants the same old thing doesn’t like doing any of the things we used to do. So in anger and punishment I avoid him to get out of it. I’ve aged in number only but he acts like I’m old. Total turn off.

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