Inspiring Women to Live with Poise, Flair, and Purpose

My Wish for All Mothers

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After reading my daughter’s guest blog she wrote for me this Mother’s Day, I had to fight back the tears. I couldn’t help but think about all of the nights that I had spent lying in bed worrying and wondering if I’d given enough time to my kids.  There was a constant battle going on inside me.  Did I give more attention to one child over the other? Am I missing important time with my children while juggling my parties in the evenings – the little time I have with them between school and bedtime? As mothers, we’re always going to question ourselves when it comes to our parenting.

But hearing all of these memories – reliving them through Lauren’s eyes  - this was the best Mother’s Day gift she could have ever given me. I realized now, many years later, that the little things that at the time might have seemed so mundane – like sipping hot chocolate with my children in the kitchen on a cold winter day – these are the memories that stay with our children throughout the years. Working hard and being a Consultant also gave me the ability to provide luxuries like taking my kids to Disney World, but what I love most about her magical memory is that it wasn’t some amusement park ride that stood out in her mind, but her first time meeting Minnie Mouse.

Looking back, I’m so proud I was able to balance family and work and show my children a strong work ethic in the process. Those Mommy moments (“You can go play if you are back by 9 and straighten up your room…”) often hurt me to enforce more than it hurt them; however, it taught them that there were consequences if they didn’t keep their word.

Now that my children are raised, I see it wasn’t about how much time I was spending with them as much as the qualityof time we spent together. This speaks volumes to that Pure Romance Consultant out there every night doing parties – she is working hard so she can continue to make unforgettable memories for her family. Every day she will question if she’s a good mom or a bad mom, but I’m here to say that’s normal! When I’m on the road, Consultants always ask me how I was able to build my business and raise my family and let me tell you the truth: as a woman and mother, you always feel like you’re never doing enough. That’s okay. In the end, it’s the outcome that matters most and reading my daughter’s blog this weekend showed me a whole different perspective.

Below is an amazing video that shows how we often see ourselves much differently than our children see us. There’s no better day than Mother’s Day to take a moment to stop, reflect and know that we are doing the best we can! We wish you a Happy Mother’s Day from our Pure Romance Family to yours.

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Memories of Mom: Guest Blog by Lauren Brisben

00000016After joining the Pure Romance Corporate team this past February I’ve really focused on what it truly means to be a successful Consultant, and I have found myself asking a very humbling question: how did my Mom manage to run a successful direct sales business and be so present for her family that they never noticed how hard she was working?

I see with a larger Downline and higher sales comes a correlation between success and guilt. I know my Mom was both number one in sales and recruiting for F.U.N. Parties. I have memories of dropping her off at her parties, driving her to the airport fortrainings and incentive trips and the frequent visits from UPS with large brown box deliveries. I can remember my mom making phone calls on our kitchen phone, pacing from room to room, limited by the spiral cord and the fact that the phone was connected to the wall. Oh, the golden years. From pizza dinners with my Dad while Mom was out working to the image of my Mom’s brown suede leather money pouch completely filled with written checks and green bills the next day, the fact that she was operating a business was evident, but never a dark spot in my childhood. You see, when I think of the years my Mom was a Consultant, I remember a woman who was ever-present. Here are some of the images that come to mind when I think of my mom:

  • Planting Pansies in the springtime and the delight she would get when her Tulips bloomed (yes, this was Patty Brisben)
  • Sweet tea steeping in a large 1-gallon glass mason jar dispenser on our deck in the summer
  • Hours at our community swim club where Mom would sometimes dangle her feet in and we would hang on as she smiled down at us
  • The year she took us to Disney World; I was so excited to meet Minnie Mouse I screamed, “MINNIE!” throughout the park until we found her
  • The pride I felt when she would show up as a volunteer for my school parties in 1st grade
  • Running off the school bus to my Mom’s smiling face, eager to ask me about my day
  • Coming in from the cold to hot chocolate after halfway finishing a snow fort with my brothers
  • The traditions she made sure to keep every year:Pickles, cheese balls, baking cookies, Christmas music and The Dickens Christmas Village décor that were always staples around our Christmas tree decorating
  • Banging pots and pans around the neighborhood every New Year’s Eve
  • Going to Shaw’s Pumpkin Farm every October to enjoy a tractor ride and select our perfect pumpkin
  • Selecting the best Halloween costume we could find at Biggs
  • The scent of her famous chili and hot cider on Halloween night
  • Kites, bubbles, sidewalk chalk and deviled eggs that were a given every Easter
  • Our special shopping spree to Limited Girls (this was a special secret we shared)
  •  How excited I would get when she got a shipment from UPS because I knew there would be a stuffed animal in it for me (I found out recently this was an incentive program the company provided that year and she made sure to hit her retail minimum so she could give one of us a stuffed animal that she earned).
  • The tedious hour she spent rolling my hair in foam rollers the night before Picture Day
  • The day I brought home an injured baby squirrel; she went out of her way to buy a tiny bottle with special formula and learn everything she could about nursing a wild animal back to health in order to release it back into the wild

Now, I know this might seem all too sweet and nice to be real, but I can assure you she had her real Mommy moments, too. For example, I can remember clearly the day she ripped all of our drawers out, went through our closets, and dumped everything into the middle of our bedrooms because we ignored her when she asked us to clean our rooms. I also remember the Mom who would pinch us under the table at a nice dinner out to Red Lobster if we were being rude or speaking out of turn. The pinch would only get sharper if we cried out or let on that she was actually doing this. She wasn’t always perfect, she was a tough Mom in so many ways, but she was really good at making us feel loved despite how busy she must have been. I can’t speak for her, but I would be curious to know how she juggled all of it so well!

Ladies’ Night

Ladies-Night“Sometimes it’s the family you’re born into and sometimes it’s the one you make for yourself.” -Carrie, Sex and The City

When Sex and the City debuted in 1998, it truly helped revolutionize the way that women felt about talking openly about sexuality, sexual health and intimacy products. Suddenly, it was okay to talk about your favorite product because, Hey, Samantha and Carrie could do it – and at a cafe diner in the middle of the day, no less. Charlotte, Miranda, Samantha and Carrie were just normal everyday women like the rest of us, and although we all tried to guess which character we most resembled, the truth is there was usually a little of all four women’s traits inside each of us! Continue reading

Work Hard, Play Hard

pattyblogthinkhardworkhardAfter returning from the Pure Romance Consultant incentive trip to Miami, Florida, this past month, I couldn’t help but think back to what business incentives meant to me when I was first starting my career.

In the late ’80s, I was a top-selling Consultant for Fun Parties, and I’ll never forget the day that I earned my very first car allowance. At the time, I was driving what my kids called the “junker,” and with that new bonus I was finally able to walk into a dealership and buy my dream car, a cherry red Dodge Daytona right off the showroom floor! It had a sunroof, and I got personalized license plates that read: FUNPTY. I was so proud of this accomplishment and couldn’t wait to drive to my children’s school to pick them up. To this day, I’ll never forget the looks on their faces when they saw me pull up in our new shiny car. Continue reading

Be Your Best Advocate

PBF Final Blog PhotoI recently scheduled a meeting on behalf of The Patty Brisben Foundation For Women’s Sexual Health with a psychiatrist who works with abused women with pain so deep, sometimes they don’t even have a clear understanding of the origin of the pain or how to resolve it. During the meeting, she asked me, “Patty, do you ever have women who come to Pure Romance Parties who have confided that they don’t even want to be touched?” The answer was a resounding “Yes.”  When these women began to open up to me and our Consultants about sexual health issues that they didn’t even feel comfortable discussing with their own healthcare providers, I knew we had to do something and I launched my foundation shortly after.  Continue reading