Guest blog by Dr. Michael Krychman
Dr. Krychman is a renowned doctor of sexual medicine, a board certified obstetrician and gynecologist, and a clinical sexual counselor and author. He has devoted his career to helping patients and their partners overcome sexual health challenges and experience a higher quality of physical intimacy. Dr. Krychman is also a specialist in survivorship medicine and provides life coaching and care plans to optimize the health and wellness of patients with chronic diseases or cancer. We were very fortunate to have him speak at our World Conference here in Cincinnati, Ohio, this past August. Please scroll down to read his full biography.
It is time for the second wave of the sexual revolution! Although it has been decades since the sexual revolution, women still face much inequality in the field of sexual health and wellness. Historically, little attention was placed on neither female sexuality nor their satisfaction; women were considered asexual or frigid, and in spite of the Victorian era’s discovery that the female orgasm was not necessary for conception, little focus was placed on the female sexual response. The realities and expectations of today’s liberated women (who may work in the home, be an executive and professional and/or primary care givers of children) are challenging and often difficult to orchestrate from a time management perspective. No wonder we have gone from the era of DINK (double income no kids) to the new acronym of DINS (double income no sex); needless to say, young couples are delaying children and working, and consequently replacing work with no sex=DINK. This reflects the busy lifestyle of many.
Surprisingly survey statistics include that:
- Approximately 10% of women suffer from lowered sexual interest.
- 96% say being emotionally connected results in the best sex.
- 92% are turned on by their partner showing vulnerability.
- 90% believe it is possible for sex to get better after years of being together.
- 50% are dissatisfied with their bedroom escapades.
- 37% feel that their time between the sheets ends too quickly.
- 84% of women have sex to get their guy to do more around the house.
- The average person had sex 103 times per year (2011) down from 127 in (2003). It’s even lower in 2014.
- 48% of women have faked an orgasm.
- Almost 2/3 of us don’t feel we have sex often enough.
- Half believe our sex lives lack excitement and variety.
- 26% approved sexual medications for treatment of male sexual problems. ZERO for women.
- 60-75% of couples say their routine is marked by the “missionary position” every Saturday morning.
The Durex Sexual Wellbeing Global Survey (a large-scale Durex poll of 26,000 people in 26 countries) found that “Americans have sex just 85 times a year — about once every 4.3 days — well below the global pace of 103 times or about once every 3.5 days. They also spend an average of about 57 minutes per week having sex — about 14 minutes below the global average, the survey learned.”
Note from Patty’s Desk: “57 minutes per week having sex!!” This stat made me anxious! My hope is that more women are trying our Pure Romance parties so they can level the playing field before they even get started. We all know that it takes approximately 20 minutes for a woman to even get her body fully into the experience…
In spite of increasing pressures, it still remains the woman’s responsibility to correct and address marital drift – the sexual boredom that often causes intimate distance between her and her partner. Women have been held responsible to transform into a sexual vixen and play the seductress to satisfy their partners sexual needs, often at the neglect of her own pleasure. Women have resorted to many feats to revitalize sexual dynamism. From Vagazzling (bedecking your vulvar tissue with rhinestones) to my new pink button (make up for the vagina), women have tried many unconventional gadgets and thingamajigs to recapture sexual excitement.
Pure Romance is the key to recapture and revitalize even the most boring sex life! Here is what I think are some practical suggestions to eliminate sexual boredom: THE PURE ROMANCE MANTRA.
Dr. Michael Krychman – Biography
Michael L. Krychman, MDCM, is the Executive Director of the Southern California Center for Sexual Health and Survivorship Medicine located in Newport Beach California. He is the former Co Director of The Sexual Medicine and Rehabilitation Program at Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer. He also is a clinical sexologist and has completed his Masters in Public Health and Human Sexuality. Dr Krychman has a degree in Erotology, Sexual Education and Forensic Sexology. Dr Krychman is also an AASECT certified sexual counselor. He is on faculty at University of Southern California. He is an Associate Clinical Professor at the University of California Irvine, Division of Gynecological Oncology and the Medical Director of Ann’s Clinic, a high-risk program for Breast and Ovarian Cancer Survivors.
His special interests include menopausal health, hormone therapy, sexual pain disorders, and loss of libido, chronic medical illness and its impact on female sexual function as well as breast cancer sexuality. He is a well-known speaker who is featured locally, nationally and internationally. He has published many articles in peer-reviewed journals and has been featured in many scientific journals and lay magazines. Dr Krychman is an active reviewer for the Journal of Sexual Medicine. He was the Scientific Chairman for the 2010 International Society for the Study of Women’s Sexual Health annual educational meeting. He is an active member in good standing in NCBC, NAMS, ISSM, ESSM, ISSWSH and AASECT. He has recently been appointed to the Standard Committee for ISSM and has been a guest professor at the ESSM Sexual Medicine Summer School in Oxford, England. He is a member of the North American Menopause Foundation Board of Directors. He is the creator of the recent WISH Initiative (Women’ Initiative on Sexual Health: www.yourvoiceyourwish.com) and the 2013 recipient of the WISH Outstanding Achievement award given by the International Society for the Study of Women’s Sexual Health. He is also on the professional advisory board for the Patty Brisben Foundation and BreastCancer.org. He is writing a monthly column for breastcancer.org entitled SEX Matters.
Dr. Krychman’s has published 6 books including, 100 Questions & Answers for Women Living with Cancer: A Practical Guide to Female Cancer Survivorship has been recently published, 100 Questions and Answers about Women’s Sexual Wellness and Vitality and Breast cancer Sexuality, Sensuality and Intimacy. He has been featured on the Today show and in the New York Times and US News and World Report World Report, The Wall Street Journal, New York Times, Health Magazine and many others.